Example

The Current State Of My Life

November 12, 2011

Categories: Lifestyle Design My Life

I looked down at my desk and before me I saw the current state of my life. As with most times, some are good…and some are bad.

  • The pills to keep the swelling in my back down while I go through PT to fix my disc issues.
  • The watch that watches the time pass until I’ll be able to get on the bike and hang out with my friends again.
  • The Brembo stickers that are proof that my car is keeping my obsessive mind occupied will I am “off the bike”.
  • The baby bottle…source of food that I can give the greatest gift I have ever received…our new son.
Example

Today marks one of the most significant days of my life…the day my wife and I get to tell everyone we are pregnant with our first kid!!!

I don’t share a lot of things about my personal life on Blogging Labs because I try to keep everything extremely focused and relevant…but this even ties in perfectly. Blogging has become an integral part of my life. It has given me a business, it has allowed me to connect with people around the world and…most importantly…it lets me do what I love.

My wife and I started our journey of starting a family a long time ago and it has been a bumpy road. Luckily, today…we had our 12 week doctors appointment and there is a tiny Sutton in there pumping away at 175 bpm!

New Journey = New Blog

Would I really be a blogger if I didn’t have a blog to go along with this new section of my life?! Hell no! So here it is…

TheCluelessDad.com

We’ll be sharing everything we can as we take the steps into parenthood. It is going to be an exciting ride.

So our family of four is about to become five this year come October. I hope my wife is ready…she is about to have 4 kids!

Sutton Family

 

Example

Last night, my wife and I were sitting around watching reruns of “How I Met Your Mother” when a line on the show hit me like a ton of bricks.

One of the main characters, Ted Mosby was starting up his on architecture firm. In the process of the first couple of days, he had done everything in his power to distract himself from the task that ultimately brought business in…calling potential clients. At the end of the show, he tells a story about an architect to builds a library and it was the perfect building…the only problem is that the building sunk several inches a year and was eventually condemned. The architect forgot to account for the weight of the books.

That is when the quote that hit me over the face really drove home.

The longer I put off starting my own firm the longer it can remain a dream and not something¬† I screwed up at. It’s like I’m giving before I even started.

He was so worried about “forgetting the books” that keeping on meaningless tasks was his way of putting off failure even if it could be the best first step he had ever taken.

Wasting Time On Things That Don’t Matter

Ok…now back to reality. This line…while in a TV show…is very real. All of you start with the hope of one day owning your own business that gives you the freedom to work when you want to from where you want to. It is an incredible dream and entirely possible. However, owning your own business also comes with stresses and tasks that are not “the internet lifestyle”.

For a lot of you (me included), it isn’t so much about the working freedom as it is about not relying on the opinion of someone else to determine your worth and how much money you bring home every week. When you are your own boss, you determine your own future. This is both exhilarating and scarey as hell at the same time for most entrepreneurs even if they don’t say it.

Even worse, there is a misconception that everything has to be perfect.

The reality (even if it doesn’t look like it from the outside with other entrepreneurs) is that you are going to mess up. You are going to make mistakes and that will affect other people. You can not get away from that fact and it happens in your daily work life already. The only difference…it reflects someone else’s brand name and you just work your 9-5 to fix it as best you can. Once you go home, you try to wash it off and move on. When you own your own business, it is completely on you and your name.

That is a scarey thought at times, but you have to remember…it is how you pick your pants up after they fall down that counts…not the fact they fell down. Sometimes in life we are given more credit on how we handle ourselves through harder times than if everything were perfect. By righting wrongs, we build solid foundations and a business you can be proud of at the end of the day. You are going to “forget the books” from time to time…and that is ok.

When I started oneninety8, Bike198 and Blogging Labs…I had these same fears and did these same “meaningless tasks”. Eventually, you have to kick yourself in the ass to really get things done and kick-start your dream.

So as you go throughout your day finding tasks to complete that really don’t matter…

…and you find yourself saying things like…

  • I’ll do it when my design is perfect.
  • I’ll start when I have x,xxx subscribers.
  • I can’t do that because I’m not big enough like those other blogs and businesses.

…just remember, you might be shooting yourself in the foot just so you can keep the dream a great dream instead of your reality. Success is brought forth through actionable steps that foster growth. The more you waste time on things that don’t matter, the longer you will be telling people about your dream instead of living it.

Do not quit before you even start.

 

 

Example

So I was needlessly wasting time on Facebook the other day when a great friend of mine linked up this video on Ted that is a talk from Nigel Marsh on the work/life balance. Ironically, this is a topic that has been at the forefront of my brain for some time.

I am an all or nothing kind of person. I hit everything in my life 110% or nothing which leaves very little room for balance. As I continue to get older and start looking at starting a family with my wife, I am coming to the gripping realization that I can not keep burning both ends of the match for forever. If I really want to have a successful, happy and full life, I have to start to learn how to not only balance work and life, but delegate tasks and give up some of my control.

The process of making work not run your life is not an easy one and it can not be done all at once. Currently, I am looking into using VA’s for a lot of my business tasks to free up time to focus on growth and planning. The future is in efficiency…not longer hours.

What Marsh goes on to illustrate in this video…that I suggest everyone listens to (not long…only about 10 minutes)…is that we are caught in a race that we can not win. We constantly put off living until a later date by stretching ourselves too thin in the present. Part of this is the structure of our workplaces, but a large sum of it boils down to our want and desire for someone to swoop in from the heavens and fix it for us.

We have to start looking within ourselves to fix the issues of our lives. The work/life balance is something only we can fix through changing our attitudes and actions. In the end…this is our one and only shot at living life to the fullest and the little moments can matter the most.

And most of all, people need to stop “working long, hard hours, at jobs they hate to enable them to buy things they don’t need, to impress people they don’t like. ”